The 3 Biggest Relationship Lies Entrepreneurs Tell Themselves

There’s a purity in entrepreneurship: The hope that if we take our idea and apply some strategy, skill, and hard work, we can make our dreams come true. It’s a beautiful thing, really, that vision of overcoming our current situation and charting our own destiny.

Unfortunately, fueled by ambition and clothed in good intentions, our pursuits can quickly overpower other areas of our lives, making the path to success look more like a trail of shattered dreams and broken hearts. I see it all too often in the people I know and work with.

So, what are these seemingly innocent lies we tell ourselves and how do we overcome them?

Lie #1: I’m Doing it All for Them

Mmm…probably not. This is something we often tell ourselves to soothe our anxiety and assuage our guilt because, deep inside, we know we are letting them down. Yes, we most likely have good intentions for how we want to provide for them, but the path of entrepreneurship is ours. Remember, you chose the entrepreneur life. (Or maybe, like Tupac, the entrepreneur life chose you.) But either way, your family, kids, and friends are along for the ride. They didn’t stop having needs or needing you when you chose this life.

Fix

When we find ourselves using this excuse, internally or externally, it’s a good time to take a few minutes for honest reflection and ask ourselves some questions like: Why did I feel the need to tell myself, or someone else that? What was happening, or what came to mind, just before I said that? If I put myself in their shoes, would I think that my schedule, interactions, and presence are making them feel like any of this is for them?

Lie #2 : I’ll Make Up the Time Later

Somehow, as obvious as this seems in our times of clearer thinking, I see it reflected in the lives of entrepreneurs often enough that it bears repeating. Time is not a renewable resource. You can’t manufacture moments with your significant other or children. The opportunities for special moments can be facilitated, but unless space is created in your schedule for the moments to occur, they simply won’t.

Fix

Yes, there will be times of rolling up your sleeves and intense focus, but we must be intentional about staying connected and creating time and opportunities where the focus is equally strong in our relationships. No one can be everywhere all the time, but we’ve all been at those events where a parent was absent, and a child kept anxiously looking for them. And let’s not pretend adults aren’t affected by this absenteeism either. They may wear a more practiced mask, but not being there to support them makes our endeavors feel like an ego-centric one-way street. It’s troublesome how often I see entrepreneurs set stronger boundaries to keep their families out of their work than they do to keep their work from infringing upon their family. That work phone call interrupting family time can wait.

Lie #3: They Understand

Maybe, if you are in relationship with a fellow entrepreneur. For most of us, that isn’t going to be the case. Even if it is, like famous entrepreneurs Leila and Alex Hormozi, (who have talked about skipping an anniversary dinner to onboard a new business partner), they still spent the time together doing what they both truly wanted to do. But for the rest of us, as much as they may be cheering us on and interested in what we are pursuing, they probably don’t understand how or why business became more important than your relationships.

Fix

They need communication that is characterized by transparency, respect, and a willingness to listen to their needs. Just because we decided to be an entrepreneur should not mean we relinquish our title of spouse or parent. They need to not simply hear empty talk that we are there for them, we need to show it in our actions. As you build your business legacy, take the time and action to create a personal legacy that you are proud of and that will outlive anything you could ever create in business.

Not only are these lies important to eradicate for the sake of our relationships, it’s incredibly hard to have the focus required to succeed as an entrepreneur when you’re at odds with your family. Worse yet, when you find yourself navigating divorce, custody, and dividing of assets. Not to mention losing the best and most fulfilling assets you could have had.

While the dream of overcoming the odds and creating a better life through entrepreneurship is indeed a noble thing, it’s even more critical that we set boundaries with our work to keep our highest callings of spouse and parents our highest priorities.

The most satisfying view from the top happens when it’s been a shared journey with the ones we love. No matter what success in our endeavors may enable us to give, those we love will always treasure our presence over our presents.

Make sure your entrepreneurial journey includes the pure priority of being present.

********

Colby Richards is known as the “Master Overcomer” in his work coaching men to become better husbands and fathers and speaking to help others overcome life’s challenges. When he and his son were both diagnosed with a rare heart condition, he had a choice to make; let his diagnosis become a life sentence or go all-in achieving his potential and helping others do the same.

Colby’s powerful story of going from a 30-year career, then leaving it all to become an entrepreneur, is both inspiring and challenging. He is praised for his ability to engage the audience with a powerful blend of humor, empathy, insight, and the “what now” that audiences expect today. Discover why Colby’s approach to motivation, purpose, and work is exactly what you need right now.

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/colbygrichards/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/colby-richards-7a48874/

Email: colby@colbyrichards.com

Header Image Credit: Nathan Cowley on Pexels.com